Experts Say We Already Have What It Takes. Oh What Rubbish.

Can you remember the last bad day you had? The one where the future seemed dimly lit and you felt frustrated not knowing what to tackle first?  Well, today’s mine.

Bad mood and overwhelmed, I feel my life has a thousand loose ends and the dragon that will slay the fears of my future is at Sonic having lunch.  Usually I’m very open to suggestions about how to get a leg up in changing my life for the better, but today when I turn to the experts on happiness, fulfillment and finding your life’s calling, they cause my aggravation to soar.

Today, their expert opinions reek of dull triteness:

Martha Beck, an Oprah sweetie, from her book,  Finding Your Own North Star:  You already have what it takes, and your only problem is keeping things as they are, or changing in positive ways. (Sure it’s that simple, Marth?)

Dan Baker, Ph.D., Director of the Life Enhancement Program at Canyon Ranch and Cameron Stauth, What Happy People Know:

Luckily, we have been blessed with an almost magical source of compensation: the human neocortex.  The neocortex is the primary area of the intellect in the brain, located in the cerebrum.  It is creative, intuitive, intellectual and spiritual.  And it is the physical site of happiness.

Wise poet, David Whyte, River Flow: New & Selected Poems and Everything is Waiting for You, says: Put down the weight of your aloneness and ease into the conversation.  The kettle is singing …   All the birds and creature of the world are unutterably themselves.  Everything is waiting for you. (Will people ring the door bell like Extreme MakeOver?)

If I don’t improve immediately, the only thing waiting for me today is a visit to the self-pity kiosk and a lap around the everybody-has-it-better-than-me track.

Listen to experts and you are led to believe the problem is you.  All you – not life’s circumstances, the economy, the moles eating through your new sosia sod, the job market, your dwindling 401k, the disappearing woodworker for your laundry area, your expired car tags, the client that got away or your souring relationship with your sibling.

And if your neocortex is malfunctioning, optimism for making your life better – through all these things –  disappears and you are stuck with the reality – life is tough, kiddo.

The road to understanding and figuring out life has long stretches of bewilderment, chaos and a lost feeling every now and then.  The path through the life-forest often is without a vista.

So that’s it for today. No view into the future. No clear path. A slew of unknowns. Dense fog rolls around in my head and no guru help will be sought to make me feel like it’s all my fault.  Just me, a bad day and a tired feeling.

Here’s the plan to get me through. You may not see it lauded by experts, but it’s mine.

1. Do one (and only one) productive, mindless thing like refold laundry or roll coins;
2. Eat whatever I want, including the dark chocolate bar in the corner of the pantry;
3. Don’t share any important viewpoints on outstanding conflicts with my husband;
4. Avoid talking to my business partner for fear of screaming;
5. Re-read the travel section of Sunday’s New York Times for possible runaway destination;
6. Walk to the end of the yard and look out over Santa Rosa Sound for a tether to hope and optimism.

I leave you confident (really, I am – sorta) that when the sun rises tomorrow, I’ll not have wasted this day but merely done the best I can with what I’ve got at the moment.

I’ve decided to roll coins.